no support group needed

HI-larious.

domo kun @ target - thoughts?

Went to Target today and saw they are heavily promoting domo kun - a common icon/fixture that is the mascot for NHK tv Japan. Has Target made another attempt to reach out to a new demographic (they also have Hello Kitty items)?

to have (a career) or to hold (a little squishy baby)?

1:08 am - just purchased and upgraded our seats for our honeymoon in Japan. Makes it a bit more real now--something to do AFTER the wedding.

I'm typically a huge worrier (I blame my Dad, the German influence that had me reading military time on my watch at the age of 3). But at least I'm always prepared. But this whole wedding thing has been pretty stress-free. Sure, we hired an awesome designer/planner who also happened to be a UCSB alumnae, and also shares a freakishly similar design ideas and overall aesthetic--a bit creepy but I'm sure she can use elements from her own wedding to make ours just as great.

So dress: done
bridemaids (and groomsmen on my side): done
bridesmaids; dresses: done
ceremony location: done
ceremony date : done
colors : picked
honeymoon location and date: done

we're working on the design elements for the invites, etc. we're trying to go web 2.0 but not thinking my aunt in New Jersey can handle it. So old fashioned invites with a splash of less traditional aspects coming up! and we are confined to 120 folks for the shindig, so making the list fit will be difficult--some people I would like to invite just won't be getting the invites. and conversely, some family "friends" wil be getting invites against my request. Eh, I just want to show up and have a great party.

We did block rooms at some great hotels in the city, and our planner is negotiating our after party at a really great bar in a very nice hotel after the reception ends--we're keeping that party going until 6am--or don't consider yourself a friend :-)

We do tastings next, as well as picking our photographer, which I think we actually agree on! Then comes the cake--yuck. I'll let him pick that since it really doesn't matter to me.

6 months and a few days from now. strange. I'll have a different last name, and a different salutation, and start thinking about having a family. If there was only a way to have your career, a baby, and just have it ALL. As sad as it has become, I am beginning to listen and trust these wise soothsayers, (or career minded women who had kids at the height of their career). Pick one or the other! But why can't I have both? I'm stubborn, assertive, tenacious....oh wait, those traits don't really make me sound like a good mom, do they--just a work-o-holic.

Beauty is in the brain of the beholder

The shower provides an opportunity to ponder, dwell, daydream or zone out as the water drapes your body. Its been a source of epiphanies, revelations and decisions, but most recently its been a place where I find myself questioning the simplicities of life.

For example, how does an object, person, song, etc that you at one time thought you found attractive or beautiful suddenly become unattractive (or vice versa)? How do I find a song I really disliked on a cd to all of a sudden be enjoyable, and on the most played list on my iPod? How do I find someone I thought was attractive to be unattractive all of a sudden?

The only thing I can think of is a changing frame of reference--or a confluence of experiences all of a sudden merging in to one, large representation of that object (smell, song, person). I really disliked avocados until I was an adult, and I believe one evening, at a party at my neighbors' house in Santa Barbara, events, people, smells created this new world where I experienced avocados in a new way. I had tied them to a good time, happy places, and an overall pristine evening. I've loved avocados ever since.

What about people? its so easy to vacillate between indifference, lust, and (dare I say) hate? More commonly, its indifference to lust/intrigue. Just like those dreams about that person in your calculus class that you never really noticed, and you go to class the next day and you have these strange sensation/feelings like you are attracted to them? What is about those dreams that makes us notice or change our feelings?

I found one of my co-workers to be attractive, physically, and then I got to know him and found him to be even more attractive --mentally and emotionally. That, in turn, made me find him even more physically attractive. But how? Why? My eyes still saw the same person--nothing changed physically. But every day I wake up and see him next to me and I get all gushy again, even though he's the same person I met 8 years ago. Consequently, how do you "fall out of attraction" with people? What in the brain changes or manifests itself in a mutant manner when seeing that same person?

Cut from the same cloth...but on the bias

I'm a female that has always been surrounded by males. Growing up, I was the biggest tomboy (and I still have a strong tomboy streak) and loved to hang out with my friends, all guys, in the neighborhood. Instead of dolls, tea parties and braiding my friend's hair, I was playing soccer, GI Joe and anything that had to do with dirt or mud. I felt comfortable. I felt like I belonged.

Jump ahead to high school. My peer group consisted of girls and guys, but my closest friends were guys--including my best friend. He and I are still very close, talking 1-2 times a week and seeing each other whenever he is here or I head out to Hawaii. The last 20 years has taught me a lot about guys, but by no means do I consider myself any expert. Now, in my mid-thirties, I'm learning ALL men share a certain number of characteristics, no matter how those men play into my life. My observations, for what they are worth....

Men:

• can't make a decision to save their lives
• are wimps when it comes to pain
• don't pick up on subtleties provided by women
  
• secretly want to relinquish control (see point #1)
• want a "dirty" clean girl
• have a soft side, often rivaling that of women